Vote or Die

In my voting ward in Madison, there are few decisions to make. First off, all voters with last names starting with A-L choose to die instead of coming out to the polling place. There is one substantial line, all registered voters with names beginning with M-Z. The election volunteers wisely break up the M-Z line to make things run faster. Only, it turns out everyone with a last name starting with T-Z also chooses death. So, we're all still in one line, all with names starting with the letters M-S. Even my first and middle initials start with M-S. Lame. Nevertheless, my waiting time is manageable, about half an hour at most.

To the substance of the ballot, there are only four decisions. All but two politicians are running unopposed for their office. I choose the president I want and my house representative, then it's off to voting on two referenda, one regarding health care, the other the school district's budget.

Everyone out there, please vote in the most important election in a generation, or at least the opportunity to undo 2000. And for the love of this country, vote correctly this time. I mean more than just an historic vote for Barack Obama. I also mean procedurally, no more mindless screw ups. We can't mess around this time. No more hanging chads, no more Ft. Lauderdale voters for Buchanan, no more nonsense.